This blog has permitted me to express my frustrations in an auto-derisory manner. I have in effect been laughed at a few times since I got here; when wanting to use the vacuum cleaner or when I missed my bus. In conqequence, I have taken the party of sharing my experiences in order to give a sense of empathy and also because in the end, those misfortunes had nothing to do with the fact of being dumb, thus are in no way shameful. I believe that laughing is easy (because instinctive, primary) but it's actually the fact of taking the time and interest to investigate on the origins of the little things we consider foolish that reveals a certain intellectual skill/ability.
To conclude,James Russell Miller (1840-1912)once said:
“If you will call your troubles experiences, and remember that every experience develops some latent force within you, you will grow vigorous and happy, however adverse your circumstances may seem to be.”
I have tried to respect the whole dummy concept in choosing the colours of my blog, and the writing style which is informative, descriptive, analytical, and auto-derisory.
Monday 23 November 2009
GO OUTDOORS !!
TOBACCO
Here again, no smoking under 18. Indeed, under 18, you will not be able to buy cigarettes, tobacco, lighters etc. In addition, a smoking ban is effective since 2007 in England. This law makes it illegal to smoke in all enclosed public places and enclosed work places in England and has inspired numerous local artists:
Some angrily:
watch SemtexTV: Skinnyman - Smoking Ban [MUSIC VIDEO]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFjdjOB3DVA
others sarcastically:
and a few with hardly any originality:
INTO THE SMOKING BAN
Naturally, all bars/clubs/pubs, Schools/Universities, Libraries, supermarkets/shops etc… are concerned but some places are excluded from the ban:
Bus shelters (if less than 50% covered), phone boxes, hotel rooms (if designated as smoking rooms), nursing homes, prisons, offshore oil rigs, stages/television sets (if needed for the performance, except in rehearsals), specialist tobacconists in relation to sampling cigars and/or pipe tobacco, in a private house, but one must not smoke in areas that one works in, or in "public" areas such as shared corridors.
And for those interested/ concerned, smoking is also permitted in the Palace of Westminster,[9] as it is for other palaces, although members of the House of Commons and the House of Lords agreed to observe the ban and ban all smoking in the palace except for four designated outside areas.
But look at the bright side, according to Allen, Carol from “Network Europe”; the smoking ban has led to an increase in "smirting", flirting with someone while they are out for a cigarette. But didn’t you know that already?! ;)
This is facilitated by the fact that is some institutions, outdoor smoker areas have been implemented. Sometimes, they are nicer than the place itself, having sofas, electric heaters… and smirting :p !
Here again, no smoking under 18. Indeed, under 18, you will not be able to buy cigarettes, tobacco, lighters etc. In addition, a smoking ban is effective since 2007 in England. This law makes it illegal to smoke in all enclosed public places and enclosed work places in England and has inspired numerous local artists:
Some angrily:
watch SemtexTV: Skinnyman - Smoking Ban [MUSIC VIDEO]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFjdjOB3DVA
others sarcastically:
and a few with hardly any originality:
INTO THE SMOKING BAN
Naturally, all bars/clubs/pubs, Schools/Universities, Libraries, supermarkets/shops etc… are concerned but some places are excluded from the ban:
Bus shelters (if less than 50% covered), phone boxes, hotel rooms (if designated as smoking rooms), nursing homes, prisons, offshore oil rigs, stages/television sets (if needed for the performance, except in rehearsals), specialist tobacconists in relation to sampling cigars and/or pipe tobacco, in a private house, but one must not smoke in areas that one works in, or in "public" areas such as shared corridors.
And for those interested/ concerned, smoking is also permitted in the Palace of Westminster,[9] as it is for other palaces, although members of the House of Commons and the House of Lords agreed to observe the ban and ban all smoking in the palace except for four designated outside areas.
But look at the bright side, according to Allen, Carol from “Network Europe”; the smoking ban has led to an increase in "smirting", flirting with someone while they are out for a cigarette. But didn’t you know that already?! ;)
This is facilitated by the fact that is some institutions, outdoor smoker areas have been implemented. Sometimes, they are nicer than the place itself, having sofas, electric heaters… and smirting :p !
IN TOWN
Let's now cover certain of circumstances you might be faced with while trying to integrate your new society.
SHOPPING
There are differences as to what you will find in shops between Britain and Belgium. For instance, I was very pleased to see that it is possible to buy drugs (for aches and pain) in supermarkets instead of always having to go to a pharmacy. Moreover, I was even more pleased by the fact that generic drugs really have kicked off, notably in hypermarkets. Indeed, you will be able to buy allergy relief tablets, ibuprofen tablets, paracetamol tablets etc. for as little as £1! Naturally, branded drugs are also available.
Breakfast is the principal meal. It would be unwelcome to spoil it by buying the wrong ingredients in order to prepare it!
Milk is an example of ingredients you should be wary of. Fresh milk is broadly distributed throughout the UK.
If you don’t like it, you’ll be able to find UHT cartons of milk, but principally in multinational chains of hypermarkets.
Whether you chose to buy fresh or UHT milk, make sure you read carefully the package since the packaging colors are inverted compared to those found across the channel.
In Belgium, red pack is full, Green is semi-skimmed and Blue is skimmed whereas, in the UK, Red is skimmed, green in semi-skimmed and blue is Full, so once again, let's update your knowledge:
ALCOHOL
Alcohol is a consequent part of our western lives. According to figures, in increases attractiveness by 10%! This is a sensitive figure especially for post-adolescent still very hormonal university students on a night out.
For those of you continentals, who are used to laxist regulations in this area, print this next section:
Know that you have to be 18 in order to buy or consume alcohol. Moreover, if you look under 25, you can be asked to show an ID. According to the English law, pubs and bars have to close at 23h unless they have a special license. The minimum age to enter a bar/pub/club is 18. If you are under that age, you will be pleased to find out that there are special under 18 nights (where no alcohol is sold). Clubs regularly close at around 2-3 am but there again, some have special licences in order to be able to close later (in general +-5am.
Don’t look shocked, I know it’s really different from the long-lasting nights out in Brussels city, where some bars open until 8am, this can only be better for your health, plus I’m sure you’ll integrate your new life really quickly!
SHOPPING
There are differences as to what you will find in shops between Britain and Belgium. For instance, I was very pleased to see that it is possible to buy drugs (for aches and pain) in supermarkets instead of always having to go to a pharmacy. Moreover, I was even more pleased by the fact that generic drugs really have kicked off, notably in hypermarkets. Indeed, you will be able to buy allergy relief tablets, ibuprofen tablets, paracetamol tablets etc. for as little as £1! Naturally, branded drugs are also available.
Breakfast is the principal meal. It would be unwelcome to spoil it by buying the wrong ingredients in order to prepare it!
Milk is an example of ingredients you should be wary of. Fresh milk is broadly distributed throughout the UK.
If you don’t like it, you’ll be able to find UHT cartons of milk, but principally in multinational chains of hypermarkets.
Whether you chose to buy fresh or UHT milk, make sure you read carefully the package since the packaging colors are inverted compared to those found across the channel.
In Belgium, red pack is full, Green is semi-skimmed and Blue is skimmed whereas, in the UK, Red is skimmed, green in semi-skimmed and blue is Full, so once again, let's update your knowledge:
ALCOHOL
Alcohol is a consequent part of our western lives. According to figures, in increases attractiveness by 10%! This is a sensitive figure especially for post-adolescent still very hormonal university students on a night out.
For those of you continentals, who are used to laxist regulations in this area, print this next section:
Know that you have to be 18 in order to buy or consume alcohol. Moreover, if you look under 25, you can be asked to show an ID. According to the English law, pubs and bars have to close at 23h unless they have a special license. The minimum age to enter a bar/pub/club is 18. If you are under that age, you will be pleased to find out that there are special under 18 nights (where no alcohol is sold). Clubs regularly close at around 2-3 am but there again, some have special licences in order to be able to close later (in general +-5am.
Don’t look shocked, I know it’s really different from the long-lasting nights out in Brussels city, where some bars open until 8am, this can only be better for your health, plus I’m sure you’ll integrate your new life really quickly!
Sunday 22 November 2009
AROUND THE HOUSE
RECYCLING
I will first bounce back from what our anonymous blogger wrote about the recycling in order to begin my next section aimed at helping you getting around the house more easily.
I do not know where our blogger comes from but in Bournemouth, two bins are used in order to recycle. One of them is for recyclables: cardboard and glass, aluminum etc. The other is for household waste.
This is a bit different from the way recycling works across the channel; in Brussels, 3 plastic bags are used, one for household waste, the second one is for plastics and aluminum, and the last one is for paper and plastic.
I don’t know that one system is better; all I know is that it’s more common to use hard bins here, which has the advantage of not having to clean up the mess made by hungry foxes in the morning…
CLEANING UP
One month ago, when I moved into my newly acquired house, my first goal was to vacuum my bedroom. I went to the storeroom, and found this object:
It was king of like what cinema analysts call a ‘red herring’ i.e. you expect to see something but you end up seeing something different.
This is the kind of experiences that make you realize that you’re away from home. How to explain… it is not that I hadn’t ever seen this object before; it’s just that this kind of vacuum cleaner is really rare across the channel. Face with the incomprehension of my housemates as I asked them to help me turn it on, I decided to investigate my artless reaction; I decided to look up vacuum cleaner in English than in French (aspirateur) on Google images. I was reassured to see that there were 11 out of 21 “hover style” vacuum cleaners on google’s first page against only 3 when typing “aspirateur”. They say that language influences the images in our heads…
When you get to the UK, you will most certainly find a washing machine in the house/apartment you’ll rent; sometimes you’ll also get a tumble dryer. This is pretty uncommon in student houses across the channel, which is causes casual travelers to flee from certain trains on weekends, fore they are full of students carrying their huge bags/backpacks/suitcases (full of clothes) on their way back to their parent’s houses.
Tuesday 3 November 2009
Prerequisites
In this section, you will be forced to realize that each action you will undertake will necessitate double precautions.
I have myself missed many busses, while standing (instinctively) on the wrong side of the road; Embarrassing moment, some girls actually took a video of me, from their phone, as I was fidgeting on the street… I wouldn’t recommend it…
Don't forget to change time zones!
You have now reached destination. This implies that you have not - been hit by a driver, nor by a mad taxi driver annoyed because he had to accept your Euros...
You will now have to tame the particularities of your « new home »
You are now entering an abode with as only desire: RELAXATION by having a nice shower after this tiring journey. You drop your bags and rush to the bathroom.
There’s a big chance that a sort of thread might appear in front of you…IT’S NOT A SPIDER WEB ! It’s more like... a sort of mechanism to control the water surge. Pull it and you’ll see a red light turning on.
Alright, now it’s time to get ready;
PARTY TONIGHT?! A good occasion to get to know your surroundings better. You like to pamper yourself; you compliment yourself for having brought a hair dryer.
But at the second you’re about to plug it, the only question going through your mind: what the ***?!
Classic mistake often made by UK beginners ^-^...
You should be able to buy an adapter in shops most shops! Here's a link for online shoppers: http://www.electromarket.co.uk/products.asp?partno=EUPLUG
and here's a link for the more traditional ones: http://www.argos.co.uk/static/Product/partNumber/9827590/c_1/1%7Ccategory_root%7CGarden+and+DIY%7C14418702.htm
Monday 26 October 2009
Temptation Island
Ladies and Gentlemen (boys and girls, workers and students, French and Belgians alike), welcome!
This is a site designed to help you continental folk on your trip across the channel. I will assist you on your quest to demystify the many oddities that you are likely to encounter when you first set foot on British soil.
Seasoned travellers will know that even the simplest of tasks can be rendered more complex than anticipated. Shopping becomes a lesson in mental arithmetic while crossing the road without making a conscious effort to look the right way first will almost certainly lead to serious injury (look left!). Even the little things take some getting used to, like the milk. It tastes different somehow. And call me barmy, but I swear that British vacuum cleaners are harder to use than their continental equivalents.
In this and subsequent posts, I will reveal all the hints and tips you need to fully understand the natives.
The British people are an odd bunch known for their originality. We will see (and attempt to understand) why the Brits drive on the left or indeed why they feel a compulsion to add an orifice to their electrical outlets.
Even the most experienced travellers and British cultural know-it-alls may find time to smile as they read this guide, if only to contemplate the sometimes huge and peculiar differences between Britain and its closest neighbours.
While you read this blog, think of the unfortunate souls who’ve stepped off the Eurostar only to be hit by an on-coming car… driving on the left. And it is with this in mind that I quote Jean Claude Van Damme’s wise words : Rester Aware.
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